Stimulants for the senses and Intellect
(Entry below was handwritten on 12/1/03, thought this seems to be a recurring theme in my life)
I was walking outside during my lunch break one day and I had a mini epiphany where I realized that my life is totally stagnating. I am stuck in a complete rut. I feel like nothing about my life has changed in a whole year but at the same time I feel that I am growing and changing a lot. It’s very paradoxical but I think that I am learning to understand myself and the world better. I just seem to be learning those lessons at a very slow pace. And I’m dying to sort of catch up to myself in order to put those lessons learned into practice.
I think there comes a certain point in life when you feel everything totally stalling and you know it’s up to you to do something drastic, totally out of character and out of the ordinary just to shake everything up and wake yourself up to the fact that you are alive right now. And the possibilities for you really are endless if you choose to see them that way. And everything you see, read, hear, or encounter seems to be a sign encouraging you to go for whatever it is you dream of. Just go for it without fear, just for the sake of trying, for the sake of proving you are alive and breathing and have a hand in directing your life on a new course.
I live close to one of the most exciting, interesting and diverse cities in the world. It’s not like I live in the middle of nowhere and have no access to fun, interesting and educational things to do. I have access to so many different kinds of stimulants for my senses and intellect. But sometimes, the fact that there are so many becomes overwhelming and I feel like there are too many choices for me to differentiate which will be the most fun for me. Still, that is a good problem to have.
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